Today, as part of of blogiversary celebration, I’m happy to have Ash from Smash Attack Reads on the blog for a guest post! Thank you, Ash, for being a part of the celebration!
Some of these are also on MY list and I could definitely come up with a whole new list of my own with books I know I will probably never read.
Smash is a social worker, reader, and blogger who “enjoys Paranormal Romance, Urban Fantasy, Horror, and Young Adult Fantasy / Paranormal. [She also loves] books that dabble in Angel or Greek mythology, have a Dystopian setting, or involve zombies!”
Books I Will Never Read
I want to thank Kristilyn for inviting me to blab on her blog birthday! I‘m excited to share the books I will never read with her readers, because hey, you want to hear about books I will never read, right? J I’m very interested to hear the discussions, bitching and book-bullying that will likely come from this post. It shall be entertaining.
Let’s start with the obvious:
Nope. It will never happen, much to my mother’s dismay. Yes, my mother. Ha. Many mothers, grandmothers, aunts, some uncles, even, have loved these books. They’ve breathed sexual intensity back into their lives, or something. I read a passage someone posted on Tumblr, and it involved a tampon. Yea…no, thanks. And there is that small fact that these derived from Twilight fanfic. Ick.
Anything by Nicholas Sparks:
I even own a few, because honestly, I want to read them. Will it ever happen? Probably Not. Why? Because I truly love the movies made from his books, and after seeing a movie, reading the book is just not the same. I much prefer reading first. I think most of us are that way. I’m also not a huge romance reader, especially of the contemporary nature. Dear John was probably the least enjoyable movie, so maybe one day. And now that I’m thinking about it, I still haven’t seen the latest one with a very grown up, smexy, smoldering, Zac Efron. Mmmm….Off to Netflix I go.
Ok, I’m back. My head is clear. *clears throat* This next one might get a tomato or 8 thrown at me. I have headgear on.
Anything by Jane Austen:
EEEEEEEP. I know! How can I call myself a reader? Or a lady? Yikes. I should hide under a rock, right? I’m so ashamed. Not really. I’m Just. Not. Interested. There are almost 1700 books on my I’d like to read before I die but it won’t happen because I keep adding to the list pile. Books that appeal to me way more than Mr. Darcy. Blasphemous, I know!
A Song of Fire and Ice series
My husband has been flying through these dense, mammoth epic fantasy books. He so wishes I would read them so we can chat about them. In all honesty, I doubt I will ever read them because I cannot handle 8 pages of description. Of a dragon. Or a nipple. Or an imp. I discovered I couldn’t handle intense descriptions when I read The Scarlett Letter in high school. I mean, I truly love the TV show. The acting and world-building are fantastic. Tyrion is one of the best characters ever, in the history of ever. Peter Dinklage is the MAN! But, those books…ugh.
And lastly….these just will never happen. Ever.